Posted on by rinaz

What do you do when you get hate comments?

Over the time that I’ve been blogging, I’ve seen a number blog suicides.

One of the latest to fall in this adversity is the blog by Shaz and Aidil – two bloggers whom I have profound respect for the community efforts that they have started. I think that its such a shame to see them pulling the plug. The reason to this is because of an increase of unwarranted and callous comments from judgemental random visitors for one of their posts.

Different people have their own opinions. That is their perogative. But at the same time, I believe that opinions should be presented in a constructive manner instead of attacking the person and being hurtful. But the reality is, that a number of people find joy in attacking others while there are some who dont seem to fathom how sharp their words could be. Most of these will be entertaining fodder for some.

I am glad that I have not reached this threshhold as of yet. Not to say that I have not had any attacks on me before, the first few times when I received these type of comments, I fought hard to control my emotions. But throughout the years, I’ve mellowed up and pretty much take these type of comments with a grain of salt. Besides, its much easier on the heart to concentrate on the positive 🙂

Have you ever had hate comments in your blog before? What would you do in this situation?

p.s For future hate comments, I’m going to give these people my scary evil look. ROAR!

rinaz says roar!

31 Replies to “What do you do when you get hate comments?”

  1. I guess I am one of the lucky few whom have not really received public hate comments but I did received them over email, through the contact box in my blog. Beats me why they couldn’t express their immerse hatred openly, perhaps due to the low traffic and nobody will get to read it very much anyway.

    When I blog about SPGs in my very first blog in MySpace, I received hate mails ranging from my personal integrity, even with insults associated with my parents. I guess that tells us very much of the intellect behind the comment. They can stir emotions, create tensions, test our patience… but the comfort is, we possess the power to ignore these. And there’s absolutely nothing they can do about it.

  3. there are always morons around who can’t stand the fact that the bloggers can write better than them.

    Of cos I’ll feel pissed if I receive such comments, but that’s exactly what they want to achieve. So I’ll just calm myself down, and shoot back with something lame to make them look more stupid than I am.

    The fact that they visit your blog means you win already.

  4. bah. pple like madonna and gwen stefani do get bad feedback too! It only goes to show that you are noticed… while non-famous pple hardly get any feedback at all.. zilch even..

    so i guess the same thing applies? *wink wink*
    erm.. you might wanna go easy on the scary look though. hehehe…

  5. Hate comments? Part and parcel of this game we call blogging. I treat them like nothing more than irritating flies. Bzzzzzz ….!!

    I think bloggers, or any writer who puts out his or her thoughts for the whole world to read for that matter, must be a little thick-skinned to withstand all the differing views.

    Can’t stand the heat, have to leave the kitchen lor ….

  8. Pingback: Global Voices Online » Singapore: Hate Comments

  9. mmm, i treat them as juvenile delinquents and ignore them? 😀

    in the first place, blogging is diary writing, about how you feel and what you do. there’s no way of pleasing everyone in this world, so why care?

    a click on the ‘delete’ button and a pat on your shoulder, tell yourself to move forward and leave those gutless delinquents who enjoy insulting people while hiding behind a monitor 😛

  10. Ed

    The person whom emailed to you directly instead of posting it on the blog doesnt want to get involved with drama I suppose. In a way, I guess thats better because the person can talk to you directly instead having it be blown out of proportions?

    Everyone has the right to speak out their mind, even in controversial topics. Remember doing general paper in junior college days? Blogging is similar to that in the sense that each person has their own point of view, but each thought has to be based on evidence to support it and the analysis should be factual rather than feeling.

    In the end, communication goes both ways, if someone were to comment in a callous way, the other party would justly be distraught. Even if someone doesnt agree with our point of view, they could still bring the message across in a mature manner.

    DK

    Hahaha! What a positive outlook to hate comments!

    CC

    The two bloggers that I mentioned are inspirational, and they have done quite a number of bloggers activities that helps to bring the community up and make it better. And for that, I respect them.

    But there are people who doesnt seem to be happy with this and find faults with what they do and now they’ve pulled down their blog.

    Of course as a community I feel sad, its like losing the presence of a friend.

    Ophelia

    Madonna and Gwen Stefani are both talented people, but as their fame grows, the more their demands grows too and this makes it easy for people to start criticizing them.

    Kylie Minogue is one of my favourite pop-stars but she hardly gets bad feedback because she’s down to earth, elegant and talented in her own right 🙂

    The scary look is to scare all the bad commenters away! *looks at you with big eyes* Hehehehe!

    Moby

    I agree, blogging isnt the same as journalism in the sense that we give our own opinions and thus may be swayed to follow to our own beliefs as compared to journalism which tries to have a balanced perspective.

    Naturally not everyone would agree with our own beliefs so we should stand for what we believe in since as like you said, the thoughts are put for the whole world to read.

    But I think that comments should refrain from being scathing and hurtful. People still have feelings, after all 😛

    Malique

    Oh like Paris Hilton and Britney Spears and Lindsey Lohan? But for some people integrity is important too 😛

    Faddy

    Me too, it was such a shock to me to see the last post and then suddenly, poof! Its gone 😐

    Xinyun

    Ooh juvenile delinquents, I have to face them every day! 😛 *ahem*

    I agree, blogging is mainly about a person’s thoughts and activities. There should be a distinction between blogging and journalism.

    Hey xinyun, this reminds me of some of the news I’ve read about how some bloggers got fired after their bosses found their blogs. Eeep!

    I think that more companies should open up to blogging as it can actually help them – think of all the feedback for their improvement. Its a win-win situation for all 🙂

    By the way, I dont normally delete these comments. I’ll just leave them on and come back to it when I’m calmer and then poke needles in a voodoo doll for them to feel back. *stares with big eyes* Hehehehe!

  11. heh, those u face everyday are cute kids 😛

    yeap, if what’s blogged isn’t backstabbing or selling company information, why should bosses fire their staff?

    bah, no freedom on blogging 😛
    mmm… *print comment + ip and pin on voodoo dolls* 😛

  12. I have received a few though not to the callous extent of them/him/her insulting my private parts or parents. Good idea with the voodoo doll. Care to show me where to get one? Or I just make a cut out from some yellow paper and use the slipper to slap a few times by the fire? 😛

    @Ed
    I think hate emails at least means they don’t want to be exposed as lame so they are scared to be exposed permanently on your blog as lame. So, they are basically cowards who want to insult you with some hate emails without being exposed.

    @xinyun
    I leave my comments there unless they are useless spam. Hee

  14. i read the shaz and aidil blog. i don’t think the comments were unwarranted, neither did they, at the start, constitute “hate tags”, just voicing of an alternative opinion about the tattooed people which shaz thinks lowly of, but other people reacted quite vehemently to them. and then everything spiralled from there. if the hate tags are judgmental, aidil and shaz are not exactly free from being judgmental themselves. if hate tags were ‘scathing and hurtful’, shaz’s words were not exactly free from being scathing and hurtful either.

    however, i do agree that they were doing good community work. but you don’t need a blog to do good community work. i’m sure the networks they have created go beyond blogs, and hopefully, they manage to continue with their good work.

  15. We also received interesting comments that posed as pissed off customers about our anti-theft softwares, and when we run a check on the IP tracking (hey, after all we have software that can trace where the stolen item is) … we realized that it is out competitor faking as customers. What to do … sigh.

  18. Xinyun

    But not all of them are cute though – Some do look cute but their actions arent or some act cute or some not cute at all 😛

    These kids I’ll give them my super scary look 😀

    Wishbone

    There are quite a number of shops selling them, the adorably cute voodoo dolls made of string in gift shops, or you could make your own out of things that you can find from around the house 🙂

    But why yellow paper and slipper? I’m not catching a vampire!

    Yanni

    I think its good to install additional applications like statcounter in the blog to at least know their ip’s. Even if these people comment anonymously, we’d get a rough idea.

    Sha

    Thanks for dropping by my blog. I didnt get a chance to see the comments on that post so I am not the best person to state my views about the debacle.

    I think its an unfortunate circumstance for everyone involved.

    And yes I agree that one doesnt need a blog to do community work. And there are various avenues to do community work. Personally for me, I think that blogging is wonderful way to inculcate awareness with friends and the people who stumble in.

    Different people have a different aptitude, and different people have their own strengths 🙂

    Paddy Tan

    Gosh, they must have been rather desperate then. Thats a low way to bring a company down. Can you do anything about it?

    Xizor2000

    I try not to delete comments if I can help it. I think everyone has the right to voice their opinion. But at the same time, I also have the right not to reply back if the person is being overt :p

    Daphne Maia

    I didnt get any hate mail! But Ed did, so Ed is a pretty important guy! 😀

  19. Hi Marina, I spent a lot of time wondering what could possibly lead people to be aggressive or derogatory to others.
    I came across a book long time ago and found an interesting concept in it: projective identification. People who are so weak and so scared by life that they feel the need of being aggressive to others with the sole purpose of studying their reaction. So that they can learn from others how to react to the events they fear most. After reading this book, my attitude towards aggressive people has changed.

  20. i think nicely done tattoos can be a piece of art. (i like to watch miami ink) and the motivations for having them done can be a deeply personal and even spiritual/symbolic thing.

    maybe people who think lowly of those with tattoos might wanna watch a few episodes of miami ink on ch16 discovery travel & living channel. 🙂

    of course in islam, any form of mutilation is haram. tattooing is self mutilation. but to me, whats done is done. to have em removed is like re-mutilating oneself.

    i make it a point to smile and give an encouraging nod to people with tattoos whenever I see them at the masjid. because in the real world, they have odds stacked against them with judegements.

    for what judge others lowly? let’s try to have more compassion for others lah. in the end how will Allah judge u? if u r compassionate to others, Allah will be compassionate to ur flaws and sins too.

  22. Attilio

    The analogy that agressive people are actually fearful people and act this way towards others to see their reaction is an interesting analogy. I’ve heard of something similar on the radio station among children in school bullying.

    I agree that fear has a large factor in agression, but I’m not certain if it fits for all as there are certain individuals whom seem oblivious towards their actions.

    Hisyam

    *stares, stares and stares at you* HEHEHEHE!!!

    Makcik

    Thanks for dropping in my blog.

    Discovery, travel and living channel! My favourite channel! Hehehe. I havent caught miami ink before, maybe youtube might have something. I read your comments and understand that getting a tattoo can be a personal thing and it can be a piece of art.

    At the same time, for many of the youths in this region, tattoos almost always is connocted to the participation of gangs. Maybe one might feel that it is a stereotype and that not everyone whom have a tattoo are anti-social.

    The reality is, that many people do have this perception though because of their personal observations.

    Personally for me, I dont have a problem with anyone (that includes tattooed, non tattooed, different races, gender and personal beliefs) unless they make a nuisance or harm me and the society.

    I agree, that everyone should be compassionate to others. Everyone has their own personal battle to go through, its good to be (or at least try to be) kind to all, even if one doesnt agree with their personal belief or choice 🙂

  23. that’s quite a chio scary looking picture of u actually, hohohoho. well rina, i guess this happens to every popular blogger. just gotta develop a thick skin and ignore the stupid comments. 🙂 if they’ve so much to say, they shld just rant about it on their own blog, or set up one themself, cheh!

    speaking of blog suicides, sigh, i miss the older days of blogging… less drama and hateful pple. this is the problem when something becomes too mainstream; by the law of statistics, there’s always the risk of having more idiots who’d spoil the whole thing for everyone else. pui. 😛

  24. To be honest, I wasn’t much of a fan of the couple’s blog in recent times. But as a fellow blogger, it is indeed no doubt rather sad to see another blogger having to shut down their blogs due to hate comments or tags. Works of morons!

    Well I guess some readers do leave comments that somehow spiralled the issue into a debate (heated or not, it don’t matter) and that’s a good thing, provided the debate is done in a respectful manner without much need in tempers flaring and having to punctuate your thoughts with profanities. However there are some senseless morons who leave tags to further add fuel to the fire and to somehow make matters worse. These are the real morons! Worse still they tag anonymously.

    I receive hate tags and hate mails too once a while. Best thing to do if you can’t handle hate tags – you disable your comments. Can’t handle hate mails then I guess it’s best you don’t reveal your email add. Simple as that. Once a while we need to realise that for the fact that some of us decides to blog while disclosing our identities, we should have known better and prepare ourselves for any kind of backlash from readers or strangers.

    Anyhow, Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri to you and your loved ones. Ride safely ya! 🙂

  25. Myztika

    Yes, I do wonder why there is an increase of nasty people commenting in blogs in more recent times. They are everywhere – especially in the more popular network like stomp and youtube 😐

    But dont let these people spoil your mood, due to personal experience, after all these years of facing juvenile delinquents kids, I’m just too tired to be angry 😛

    Edroos

    Yes, I agree, that differing views are makes for good and mental discussion, provided that its done in a mature and respectful manner. It is unfortunate that there are a number of people who dont seem to be aware of how their words will effect others.

    I think that, thats a good advice about hate tags 🙂

    Selamat Hari raya to you too Ed! Wahahaha! Ketupat and ayam masak merah! Here I come!

  26. mann.. now i noe why shaz and aidil close their blog.. boohooooo… i love reading their entries.. sighh… what a way to a closing.. i hope they will open up again a blog… 🙁

    Selamat Hari Raya to YOU .. 😉

  31. today is friday, 16th November and I only just realised there was this post! i only found out because Yanni told me in her email. sorry. when we left the blogosphere, we really left.

    Gosh. thank u marina for your support. *hugs* i didn’t realise our blogging activities had such an impact on you. =)

    our blog is back, refreshed.

    im not going to defend myself or reply to any of the above comments. it’s all water under the bridge now. =)

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