According to Statistics Singapore, the number of divorce rates has been on an increase. There was a stage when 1 out of 3 marriages will end up in a divorce.
This trend was a concern for the Muslim organization bodies in Singapore such that for the past 15 years or so, they implemented a compulsory marriage preparatory course for all Muslim marriages in Singapore to prepare and educate future marriages for the prevention of divorces.
Recently, I’ve attended and completed the marriage preparatory course at the Assyakirin Mosque. Prior to this, I did not realise that it was mandatory till only recently. I assumed that that the course was for knowledge for keeping a happy marriage. Thus, I did not have much expectations.
When I attended my first lesson, early Sunday morning, I was greeted by the staff-helpers at the mosque and was handed a schedule, a bridal magazine as well as the course textbook. I flipped through the textbook and though it was not thick, it looked comprehensive with the different modules laid out.
In my book, there were 8 modules altogether which was presented and discussed in depth by our various coaches from Kasih Sejati.
Personality analysis
Knowing the in-laws, money matters and wedding plans
Understanding solemnization and responsibilities of a wife and husband
The meaning of love, sex and intimacy
Challenges during marriage
Preparing for a family
Communication and the language of love
Conflict and resolution
I thought that the lessons were interesting and I realised at how unprepared I was before. I learnt a fair bit of information which I think will be useful in preparing myself for my future.
The entire course ended with each of us writing a love letter for our partners with words of affection, hopes and encouragement for our future. I thought that was very sweet.
I found out later that it was a requirement for all Muslim Marriages to be certified with a marriage preparatory course certification regardless of what nationality they are. Hence Cart arrives here in Singapore in December, we’ll be taking it together before our solemnization.
I think it will be a learning experience for the both of us.
Have you heard of the marriage preparatory course before? What do you think of it?
Yesterday, I made the painful decision of not going to Italy to see Cartcart in June. This is to save some money for the both of us for the wedding at the end of the year.
This is heartbreaking because I miss him tremendously and I feel miserable. But after a while, I was inspired to do a montage of our happy times together :)
Without realising it, it was already his final day in Singapore. Where did all the time go?
After the pizza outing and that everyone has left, I started to feel my emotional turmoil again. And the floodgates opened. All these while, I’ve always felt sad when we had to say our goodbyes, but this time round, the feeling of sadness was more intense than ever, that it caught me by surprise. My eyes hurt and felt swollen as I went on my journey home.
Friday, 4 Jan 2008
After I left work for the day, I parked my scooter in the carpark near the Bed and Breakfast. When I arrived, Cart took out the last pack of pasta that my aunt has kindly made for him and asked me to join him for a late lunch. I was surprised as I would have been too hungry to wait for anyone. He said that he preferred to eat with me than eating alone. I thought that that was kind of sweet :)
It may not look good, but it tastes absolutely delicious!
After our lunch we decided to take the scooter to head to Sim Lim Square. We proceeded to the carpark and I was just about to rummage in my handbang to find my keys when my eyes scanned the scooter box. And my eyes went completely opened wide. Kind of like what you see in this picture below.
My keys were in the scooter box!
How could I have left it in there!?
Someone could have just taken the keys and rode away with my beloved scooter!
I must have been extremely stressed out. It was disconcerting.
Cartcart tried to calm me down and I realised how lucky I was that the scooter wasn’t stolen.
At length with Cart safely behind me, before heading to Sim Lim, we first stopped by to have coffee at Geek Terminal. It was open! We were finally here! I told Cartcart that Geek Terminal was the place where I believe serves very good coffee.
I didnt drink all that, this was what my friends had the last time we were at Geek Terminal
After our coffee, we then continued our journey and rode past Tekka Market and I parked my scooter in an area somewhere near Chinatown and in a short time, we had a leisurely walk to Sim Lim Square.
Sim Lim Square is a famous center for electronic gadgets. It was interesting seeing Cartcart there. As we both loved electronic gadgets, we were going about different stores peering and examining anything that caught our eye.
Eventually, after comparing the prices, Cart decides to get the Creative Zen. He looked quite pleased at himself after finding out that it was duty free. :)
The gadget was spiffy. I’ve been enamored over it after seeing the guys over at Tech 65 do a review over it. I tried getting Cartcart to buy one for me too but he said no. Instead he said, “I’m getting you something else.” I stared quizzedly at him and he continued, “where is the nearest jeweller here? I want to buy you a ring”
OOH!!!
I was most excited that my mind couldnt compute momentarily. I called up my good friends Geri and Juli to ask them if they knew of any jeweller in the vicinity.
Geri adviced us to head to Parco Bugis Junction as there were a number of Jewellers there. So we walked around and sure enough, there were about 5 jewellers side by side.
We walked into one of them. It definitely was an interesting experience being with Cartcart in a jewellery shop. I asked gingerly about their engagement rings. Already in my mind I knew that I wanted. A simple but classic solitaire set in yellow gold.
And the man at the counter showed us a collection of beautiful and exquisite rings. But I didnt want any of them, they were all white gold.
So we tried going to the other jewellers, Goldheart, Lee Hwa, Soo Kee, Meyson, Citigems. And it was all the same. None of them carried yellow gold with them.
One of the goldsmith helpfully adviced us to go back to Chinatown to see if there were any jewellers there.
So we headed back to Chinatown. By then, there were a number of street buskers around. It was fascinating to see them. One of the performers were doing a beautiful piece of calligraphy using his mouth.
That was when we stumbled upon a jeweller as we passed by and I noticed yellow gold in their display case!
But when looked at their designs, I did not really liked it. The designs looked much too garish and what made it worse was that they were all very tight! Suddenly I felt very self conscious of my body type. After a while, I found one that could fit me. Vehemently, not wanting white gold and with little time left, I looked at Cartcart and said, “I think I could learn to like this one.” Cart looked at me and asked, “Are you sure?” I just nodded my head and he proceeded to take out his card.
That was when the goldsmith shook his head and said, cash only please.
we were crestfallen. Eventually, the both of us left the shop quite dejectedly.
cart : I still would like to give you a ring
rinaz : Lets go back to parco, I dont really like white gold, but I can live with it
cart : Ok. lets go
We decided to walk by the other street as we both did not want to walk in Bugis Street where it would definitely be crowded by this time. That was when suddenly, out of nowhere, pops out a man out of a jewelery shop. It was Taka Jewellery. I wasn’t very optimistic. I was sure that it would be the same as the others.
Man : Hello! Would you like to come in?
Cart : Do you have yellow gold?
Man : Oh yes we do!
And just like that, I saw the ring that I wanted. A simple solitaire set in yellow gold. It was perfect! We were both pleasantly surprised at our find.
Later on Cartcart took the ring and slipped it to my finger, and proposed. Of course I said yes! :)
We had a quick vegetarian dinner at one of the hawker center where I had the yummiest spring roll ever. For a vegetarian one, I was impressed at how flavourful it was that I went back for seconds, even though I wasnt hungry.
We went back to the scooter where I found out that my cashcard was stolen! I had forgotten to take it out of the IU-unit and someone swooped to steal it. Thats twice the blunder that I did today. I was in extreme stress that I could not even think properly.
I was so upset with myself.
We rushed back to the bnb to grab his luggage before grabbing a cab to the airport. The cabbie was cheerfully chit chatting with us, when we almost reached the airport, both of us were amazed by the long queue of taxis at the airport. The taxi driver said that he had to wait about 3 hours once while waiting in line for a passenger.
As soon as we reached there, I began to feel very sad. I dont think we spent enough time together. I really didnt want cartcart to go.
But in no time, he was in the ticketing queue and then I reluctantly let him go and waved while he disappeared off in the boarding hall. And my heart just shattered. In front of everyone, I started to have tears rolling down my cheeks. I just couldn’t help myself …
Aftermath
Its been about 3 weeks now that he’s left. Of course I do miss him alot. But life goes on. I guess I’m very lucky in that we both want to make this relationship work.
So for the moment, I’ll just try to keep being positive and hang on in there. And we’ll be planning our wedding this coming December. But as much as just thinking of the expenditures and the planning makes me stressed out, I cant wait to become Mrs Cartcart :)
Cartcart, I love you very much. Thank you for being there for me. Thank you for being the way you are. Thank you for loving me :)
I took Cartcart to Little India to for the Indian vegetarian food. Ever since the first time he ate here, he has enjoyed eating Indian food alot. I think that it is rather convenient since we have a peace of mind, without having to worry about the food containing any meat.
We headed to a little place called Komala Villas where they served Indian food in a sort of fast food restaurant. Cart ordered the North Indian set while I had the Naan set.
A slightly eaten Naan bread before I remembered to take a picture
Cart’s meal had a piece of deep fried dried chilli in the middle of his meal. He started to pick up the chilli and ate it! I was horrified! I’ve never seen anyone eat an entire chilli before. And I stared at him with my mouth open as he muttered out a satisfied mmmmm.
What? He ate an entire chilli? Unbelievable!
We took the bus to head to the bnb where we caught on tv mobile, news about the assasination of the ex Prime Minister of Pakistan, Benazir Bhutto. The first thing that came in my mind was how unreal it was.
Fri, 28 Dec 2007
After Cart’s Islamic studies, mum, Cart and I headed to the Geylang Food Center for a spot of lunch. There were so much things to eat here. There were rows and rows of stalls selling wonderful local fare.
Mum and I ate Ayam Penyet.
A slightly eaten Ayam Penyet before I remembered to take a picture
This was one of my favourite food. Ayam Penyet is deep fried marinated chicken that you eat with raw vegetables and chilli paste. The hotter the better! Granted that it was a much different variation of the Ayam Penyet that I was used to, with the chicken being drizzled with soya sauce, it was still very good :)
Mum asked me to let Cart try the Serabai
This was a traditional Malay dessert made up of glutinous flour and eaten with gula melaka (palm sugar) Yum!
Mum decided to show Cartcart a couple of the everyday things that we had in Singapore so we walked to the wet market that was nearby.
And she showed the local vegetables, and foodstuff like spices, pandan leaves, tempeh (fermented soybean) and others, while she amiably chatted up with the ladies that were manning the stalls. That was when Cartcart spotted out some babas brand curry powder and said, “I want to make curry!” and proceeded to buy all three types that he saw in front of him.
As mum had prior engagement, Cart and I proceeded to go to the furniture shop called Barang-barang. In Malay, Barang-barang is a plural form of stuff. Henceforth, its a shop that sells stuff :P
Actually Cart needed some respite from the hot sun, while I just wanted to have fun and then take a nap after our lunch. I spotted a chair that looked almost like the one I saw in Secondlife.
Cool stuff!
We reached our aunt’s place later in the evening where she was already waiting for us. My aunt has been looking forward to meeting Cartcart that she’s been trying to make me feel guilty for not introducing him to her when he came last year.
My aunt’s colourful house
But I was glad that we came over this time because Cart seemed to enjoy himself. He commented that my aunt had a great personality - very friendly, hospitable and a great cook.
It was funny because just a few moments ago, my aunt told me that she was a little worried as she has never cooked vegetarian food before. She had to crack her head and wondered what to cook. And in the end, she made Omelettes, Chap Chye (stir fried mixed vegetables) with mushroom sauce and some fried Macaroni.
And it was all good! :D
My aunt, having already been to Italy some years back, started to talk about her experiences there to Cartcart. And one of the topic that they talked about as seen in the video below, was about coffee :
We then quickly said our goodbyes and went up to say hello to my parents since both my parents were home.
Cart started to ask about my dad, whom was hurt during the accident and was surprised to see the well made prosthetic fingers that the doctors made for him. It looked natural, he said. And my dad seemed happy to hear that and even invited Cart to touch his fingers.
Cart handed some chocolates (which was the first and last time I saw, since my siblings were all chocolate monsters) as well as this very interesting thing :
This was a Panforte. I guess its a sort of hard pie which is made up of spices and dried fruit. Mum couldnt wait to open and try it out.
A couple of weeks ago, fellow pingster, Tstar, twittered about her handbell group performing for a concert during the holiday week. After we bugged each other on gmail, she asked if I would be interested in attending. Naturally I said yes!
The tickets that Tstar reserved for us!
Thus on wednesday evening, Cartcart and I spent some chill out time over at City Hall. Prior to that, it has been a busy day for us, rushing over to attend the Islamic class in the morning. We were glad to have a little bit of respite afterwards.
We spent a little time for some yummy coffee at the coffee connoisseur and I admired the adorable decoration which still had a christmas theme to it. It was a warm and cosy place to be.
Afterwards, we took a walk along the parliament road where Cartcart admired the historic buildings that were around since 1800’s.
Somehow this picture looks very London-ish. Credits to Cartcart
We finally reached the Arts house where there were a small number of people already lounging around. Once we found the poster, we went up the rustic staircase and went to have our seats.
Though I’ve been to the arts house, I’ve never actually been into the chamber before. This was where formerly, the place where the member of the parliament gathered to debate. It was a very charming place. The seats were so antique! I even saw very retro speakers attached to the chair.
The show started just as soon as we sat down. I’ve never been to a handbell concert before, hence it was very interesting for me to observe the proceedings. I saw the conductor raise his baton, and then the music began.
My gosh, it was such a beautiful sound that both Cartcart and I were so enthralled by it! It was such a lovely and relaxing sound that everyone who attended the concert were mesmerized.
I scanned out for Tstar during the concert and there she was, cheerfully swirling her bells around. Tstartsar looks so elegant with her outfit, the cute purple tie scarf and her black gloves. I couldnt wait to say hello to her afterwards.
During the intermission, I made my way to the ladies for a bit, and when I came back, I saw her chatting to Cartcart and I was quite surprised. That was when they retold their narration.
Tstar : Where is Marina? I thought I saw her here.
Cart : Hello. She is in the ladies for a bit. My name is Roberto
Tstar : Who?
Cart : Roberto … Hmm Cart
Tstar : Oh! You mean Cartcart? Hi!
That was when I saw Tstar’s family coming over to give her their support. It was always heartening to see that :)
I quickly took asked for a picture with Tstartstar but when I saw the picture I was rather shocked.
I looked like a giant next to Tstar! I dont remember being so big!? I’m only 1.6 meters -_-”
I’ve always had fond memories of the Science Center. Back in school, we’d have rather regular excursions to see the exhibitions or omnimax films or to participate in their science courses.
It was probably in 2003 when I last been in the science center. Even so, it was for a robotics competition rather than for leisure.
Last year, I thought that I’d bring Cartcart to go to the science center as he loves maths. But it has been an unusually heavy downfall of rain the entire week that he was here last year. Hence, when the weather appeared to be fair this year, I dragged Cartcart to my stomping ground, Jurong East :)
The entrance to the Science Center was already crowded by the time we reached there in the early afternoon. There were a plentiful of people around, kids, parents, tourists as we walked down the corridor past the waterworks.
For many of the parts, the Science Center was quite familliar as how I’ve remembered it the last time that I was there. There were still a plentiful displays that I still remembered. But at the same time, there were a number of new displays that I saw for the first time.
Like this painting of the President of Singapore, Mr SR Nathan
But as cool as the painting was, I dont think I would like to be in the same room with this painting, alone (especially at night time) And I think you’d feel the same too!
And there were plenty of other cool stuff around too, like these display made up of laboratory created pills in the Biology Segment :
As well as this interesting interactive game where one goes in front of a green screen :
And when we walked to another area, I very nearly kicked myself for not coming to the Science Center before my examination period as there it was, the ecology section where everything was very useful for my geography knowledge!
Humph!
There were so much things to see that it seemed indredulous when we found out that we did not have enough time to see everything! We had a an omnimax film to catch at 6pm. I thought for sure that two hours would be more than enough time to look around Science Center. But we did not even get to explore the second floor -_-”
We did however had just about enough time to pose with a little friend :)
—
Since the first time going there, I’ve always enjoyed going to the omnimax theater. It was, and still is the largest theater that I’ve been in. With the screen being about five storey tall, it was an immersive experience that it was easy to feel like being part of the movie itself.
It was an arduous climb to the back of the theater as the way up is alot of stairs. And one may feel vertigo if they stood up and look down as it was quite steep. But I think the best seats are the ones at the back. The poor latecomers would have to crane their neck up.
The show that we were watching was the secrets of the pharaoh. It was like watching the BBC’s walking with dinosaurs where current scientists explore how mummies were preserved and using the evidences that they had, pieced up the clues.
And like all the times that I’ve been in the omnimax theater, I was very drawn to the beautiful, lush and rich visuals.
I almost half expected Brendan Fraser to appear in the screen.
—
After the movie, I decided to take Cartcart to IMM, which is probably one of the largest shopping center in the area, for dinner.
We were standing there at the directory for a full five minutes, wondering what to eat when Cart decided that he would like to try to go to Spagetti Too and try their pasta.
Me : Huh? Pasta? You come all the way here to have pasta?
Cart : Yes, so that I can rate your pasta here :P
Spagetti Too was a relatively new cafe in IMM. Everything in the menu looked so tempting. The front counter was so colourful that it seemed as if it was beckoning us to come closer.
What a nice surprise when I saw that there the cafe had a halal certification (it didnt carry it the last time I saw it)
Behind the counter was an enclosed area that diners could sit in, the decor was clean and simple.
We made our orders by taking the paper menu which is provided by the side of the table and mark a tick to the items that we wanted. And then we hand it to the front counter and then make our payments.
And I was doubly surprised to see that the food was affordable. I think we spent less than $25 for full set meals for the both of us. I’m impressed!
As I still had a craving for chicken chop, I decided to order that, while Cartcart had Vegetarian Pasta. We had the Garlic Bread with Cheese ($1.70) as an appetizer.
Cart liked this bread alot. He said that it was nicely cooked and perfectly crunchy. But I thought that it was a little bland. I looked around for the (non existing) tabasco sauce.
Nevertheless, we didnt have to wait long for our food to arrive. By the time we are done with our appetizers, in about 10 - 15 mins, the helpful crew handed over our main meals.
This is my yummlicious Grilled Chicken Chop with Mashed Potatoes ($6.90) I do love my chicken alot. The meat is tender and juicy and was just a delight to savour. The sauce tasted more like black pepper sauce than mushroom sauce, but it was still really good.
Initially, I complained pointed out to Cartcart that there should have been some gravy on top of my mashed potatoes. But once I took a taste of it, it was just love. So smooth, so savory, so creamy. Yum!
It may look plain, but it sure is full of flavours.
This is Cartcart’s Vegetarian Pasta ($5.90) Cart said that although the dish was more of a fusion dish than true Italian pasta, it was still cooked well enough with the pasta not being overcooked - something that he is very iffy about.
And in the end, I was surprised to see that he even enjoyed his pasta :)
And for dessert Cart had the Chocolate Brownie while I had the Apple Cobbler ($2.50 each)
What can I say? We both loved our desserts. They were both inviting and both had a huge dollop of ice cream on top of it. My only mini issue is that I dont like my apple cobbler to be heated up. I think it was nicer to eat at room temperature or cold, unlike brownies that taste good heated up. But its not such a big deal, being such a value for money :)
If you are anywhere in Jurong, give this place a try. Good food, cheap prices. Go. Just go :D They dont have a website yet, but click here to see the yummilicious menu.
Next : Meeting Tstar and the beautiful sounds of handbells!
After confirming our appointment with the ustadz the previous day, Mum, Cart and me headed to Darul Arqam in the early morning to attend his first Islamic lessons.
We were introduced to a Haji Mustafa, a retiree who decided to spend part of his time teaching in the center.
It was interesting for me to observe the man. Even though he was in his golden years, he was very fit and active. Full of vigor, he started describing the session coverage and then began the introductionary lessons.
Photo credit Cartcart
After the session, we decided to have lunch at the nearby coffee shop and we looked around to see what cartcart could eat. Cart has made up his decision to become a vegetarian for a number of years and I tried my best to be careful and had to make sure that the food ordered for him has completely no tract of meat in it.
Especially after last year when we patronised a restaurant where there seemed to be a miscommunication and we found out that the food contained meat. I felt really bad as Cartcart had accidentally taken a bite because of my negligence.
Finally we saw an Indian stall which was selling vegetarian meals and Cartcart had a nice plate of Masala Dosai.
As mum had a prior engagement that day, she left us to our own devices after lunch time and I brought Cartcart to sight see a little :)
We stopped by Bugis where there were already large amount of people congregating around the christmas decorations and children playing around the fountains.
The movie I am legend was premiering. Having already read the book by Richard Matheson, Cart was very keen to watch the movie. So we headed to Shaw Towers where we caught the afternoon show.
Unfortunately for me, being not up to date with movie trends, I didn’t realise that the movie had some horror segments till we were in the middle of the movie.
I pulled Cartcart’s sleeve when Will Smith’s character entered a dark building and stumbled upon some creatures.
Me : Oh my gosh! What the heck is that?!
Cart : Its vampires
Me : What? Vampires?!
Cart : You didn’t know this is a movie about vampires?
Me : No … Oh my gosh! So scary!
And for the entire movie, there I was, wide eyed, sunk in my seat
It was an exciting movie, and I thought that Will Smith did a fine job of connecting the viewers to his character. But without giving too much spoilers away, I was left unsatisfied with the ending of the movie. It was just too hollywood-ised for my taste.
Later on Cart explained to me that in the book, there were a number of survivors whom did not get completely infected but physically looks the same as a vampire. These survivors formed their own society.
Unfortunately for them, the protagonist, Robert Neville was not able to differentiate between the survivors and the vampires and kills them both, making the survivors live in fear of him, comparing him to a mythical character, hence the title, “I am legend”
And at that point, I thought to myself at how interesting it was to actually watch a movie told in the point of view of the zombies / vampires. And I could not help but to carry on discussing about the movie with Cartcart.
How refreshing it is to have someone to banter about movies with!
